As most of you know, I fall off the broken path on the weekends. Recently, I did a series about books we loved when we were younger. Tonight, I feel the need to blog about life. Recently, I realized that I am not happy with my life. For the past few years, I have lived my life for others. I did and led my life in a way that would please others, this left me stressed, tired, and worst of of not a happy camper to be around. I have decided to quit college. School was never for me, and it never will be. An associates' degree is enough to get me by in life, but a 4 year degree will not help me do anything but be in debt. I don't need a degree to do what I love. I am an artist, I love uniqueness on all levels. I admire a piece of work inked on someone's arm, the words in a brokenhearted poem, the beauty of a raw picture. I can't sit still or do the same thing for to long. I am all the time changing my makeup style, my hairstyle and color, my fashion sense, but the past year or so I became an entirely different person. I want to get back to who I want to be. I am always that character who is indecisive and doesn't care about money or what other people think. I'm nosy, I cry during sad movies, and I am a hippy at heart. Now I say one thing and do another, I worry about what people say, and I am so unhappy I don't even wear makeup. This entire week I wore no makeup, yes seriously! NO MAKEUP! That girl isn't me, the one who is so unhappy she doesn't even care in the mornings. The girl who is so stressed out that she eats all the time and can no longer fit into her clothes. So here I am bearing my soul to the world because I need a reason to change. I need a reason to be the wife and mother I should be. I need to be me and not feel like a failure because I am. Hear me roar!!!!!!!!!!
I used to bite my tongue and hold my breath
Scared to rock the boat and make a mess
So I sat quietly, agreed politely
I guess that I forgot I had a choice
I let you push me past the breaking point
I stood for nothing, so I fell for everything ( lyrics from roar by katy perry)